Can I help you?

Today as I was walking home from school, I saw my neighbor, a very frail older woman, walking home with two heavy grocery bags. Every few steps she would put the bags down and take a break. I carefully practiced my "can I help you?" phrase in Japanese so that I could politely ask her if I could help her carry her bags home. I think she is a little bit afraid of me, so I wanted to make sure I asked her in a very non-threatening way. When I caught up with her I asked her if I could please ask her, she refused. I asked her a few more times, but, realizing that I was probably making her really uncomfortable, I gave up and walked past her. I understand why she might be wary of me, and I suspect that she may have refused help from any young Japanese person, or anyone she didn't know well, but it was still so frustrating not being able to help her, and realizing that if I insisted on helping her, she would have been even more uncomfortable. I can't say things like, "My back is strong!" or "You shouldn't have to carry these by yourself," or "we're going to the same place, it's no trouble at all!" in Japanese, so I just have to accept the fact that there are many things I can't do in Japan. It certainly makes you appreciate being able to speak the same language as the people in your community.